Days 19 - 21

We attended a wedding on Saturday. When we were first married we spent a lot of Saturdays attending our friends' weddings. That was nearly thirty years ago. Now we are attending the weddings of their children! These little ones who played with our children, whose photos we have in our albums alongside our own children, who we remember putting to bed in our spare room now they are marrying! How time flies! Being Baptists we dont do Christenings and although we do have services of Dedication they are not the big family event that Christenings often are so in my heart I wonder what the next occasion will be when we meet up?

And what is the role of the "friends of Mum and Dad" at the wedding? At every wedding breakfast along the back wall is a selection of greying men accompanied by their wives. They dont know the music at the disco, cant quite sort out who is who, and spend a lot of time either in reminiscence or in silent contemplation. We usually have to bend close to hear what we are saying to one another and cultivate an expression of benign blessing, a sort of grin, which seems to be saying "bless you all"!

I reckon our role is crucial. We represent wider society which respects the institution of marriage but understands that marriage has to be worked at and that it will survive all sorts of pressures and failings if there is a will to succeed. Without us there doing the grumpy old man bit, or making slight fools of ourselves on the dance floor the young would be left alone and that would not be right. Along that back wall is an accumulated wisdom which only decades of experience will bring.

And yes the weddings of friends' children are special. I love to see the young enjoying themselves and recall a line from a poem I read at school:

Bliss was it in that dawn to be alive,
But to be young was very heaven!

God bless you Jo and Andy and give you a long and happy life, a brace of children and in thirty years time many invitations to the weddings of their friends!